Grant Awarded by Women In Film and Television

Hello dear ones,

Please forgive my absence. I've had a myriad of diversions occur, one of which is the passing of my father. We have been adjusting to the new normal, so thank you for your patience.

Last night was a wonderful celebration, an event put on by Nashville's Women In Film and Television at Skyway Studios. It was a huge success and you could tell hard work paid off.

I was awarded their annual Finishing Grant!

The grant is awarded to a woman who has produced or directed a film in Tennessee. Lucky for me, I wrote, directed, AND produced my film in Tennessee and it's also SAG AFTRA.  The name of  the short film is STOLEN and stars Buffi Holland, Todd Vance, and Carla Christina Contreras. The film follows the psychological breakdown of both parents as they await news of their abducted daughter. This film is truly my baby, as I am taking my sweet time in making sure it's as perfect as possible. When it's complete, I will submit it to Sundance and Cannes and any other festival I can.

But only when it's ready.

So, let me publicly thank Women In Film and Television for the grant. Thank you so much for believing in me and in my project. It's not an honor that I take lightly. I am truly grateful, and the monies bestowed will be used on the coloring and the sound design. Anything left over will go to the festival fees. Thank you for helping make me make movies that matter.

I must take a moment to continue my thanks, because I never would have gotten this grant if it wasn't for my team.

I must thank my actors. Without you, STOLEN would not be a viable project to consider pushing for festivals. You are effortlessly magical, each one of you, and I'm eternally grateful you agreed to be on the project.

Buffi: Your performance brings those who watch it to tears every time. Proud isn't an adequate word I can use to describe my feelings about your work. I hope this catapults you into bigger and better things. You deserve it!

Todd: A big toast of thanks to you, my friend. Not only for our set, but your incredible performance. You captured the essence of your character and then some. I'm so grateful you agreed to be a part of my little film. It's better because you did! I hope this opens more doors for you.

Carla Christina:  If it wasn't for you, we never would have gotten SAG AFTRA status! Thank you for being such a consummate professional, and friend. You make it so easy to direct. Your insight into characters and organic performance is what makes me love what I do. Effortless acting, effortless directing.

To my DP: Thank you so much, Bengy del Villar, for your insight and honesty in all you do. I can implicitly trust you, and that, my friend is golden.

To my AD: Emily Steele Van Brocklin you are a joy to work with. With all the hats you wear, it's no surprise that we gel together so well. Thank you for helping create something we will be proud of.

To my crew: Nothing could have been done without you, and I don't forget such things. As this film progresses, it's my prayer that it will be something you will be able to brag about, that you worked on the set of STOLEN, and that more work will flow your way.

Dialogue. Sweet Niblets of Mercy. DIALOGUE.

Dear Beloved Hopeful Screenwriters,

Please. In the name of all things good and holy, learn to write good dialogue. Because what I've been seeing is horrible. Terrible. Soul crushingly terrible.

But let me tell you how I really feel.

A well meaning soul sent me a script to peruse. I'm harder to pin down these days, but as a favor for a friend (and you know who you are, and when your poodle goes missing just mail me the ransom for his safe return) I read it.

The dialogue was well, sorely lacking.

First of all, your hero isn't going to KNOW everything, or we CAN'T go on a journey with him/her. And he can't just BLAB out pertinent information because we, as the audience, have to FEEL like we figured it out.  And your VILLIAN? He HAS to believe he's the star of his own plot, his own movie. If he's not equal to your hero, or even better, more powerful than your hero, is this really a good match up? We ROOT for the underdog. ALL THE TIME!  We rooted for Forrest Gump and LIFE was against that guy!

But I digress.

Dialogue.

Writers. PLEASE. Get it through your head that you don't write the same way you talk. Writing is more formal. In writing, you won't have as many contractions ('She did not say that to you, Cynthia!')
among other wonderful grammatical bombs I could drop.  So there's that.

PLEASE. Do a back story on all of your characters. You'll thank me. You'll be surprised what you learn. "Amy" your main character has a hometown. Where? Okay, Brooklyn. Guess what? Amy now has an accent, an accent that comes with a pentameter all it's own. And how do we know how thick that accent is? By her dialogue. While you are learning such things about Amy, guess what else you learn? Her family life. What makes her tick. And suddenly, you realize Amy WOULD NEVER put up with a guy grabbing her, and instead of tolerating it, she delivers a SLAP that knocks a guy over. Which creates conflict for a scene, which is perfect because ALL of your scenes need conflict. ON EVERY PAGE, or STOP WRITING NOW.

Which brings me to this: PLEASE. Keep a dialogue journal. You overhear things all the time. If you don't, you need to set your phone down more often. The things people say are real, and your script needs real. Utilize these overheard conversations and incorporate them.

Do Not Use cliches in your writing:

Steve: Look at that. It's a bomb.
Joy: Oh no, what do we do?    <==cliche woman in distress. No one buys this anymore.
Steve: We have to disarm it.  <==seriously? HELLO! Who DOESN'T KNOW THIS? Your audience are NOT idiots, at least they don't like people pointing that out if they are!
Joy: Do you know how to do that?
Steve: Why yes, Joy. I went to a bomb disarming school last year and I have the knowledge to do this task.  Please step aside.
Joy: EEEEEEk! I'm scared. You're so strong and smart, Steve. I'm so glad I was partnered with you for this patrol.

Laugh. Go ahead. But I read this dribble sometimes. This is not the script I referred to earlier, but it's actually been handed to me. With a hopeful screenwriter smiling proudly with his finished second draft script in his hand.  (insert rolled eyes here).

First of all, that scene is horribly sexist. (If you have an issue with that statement, stop following my blog).  Secondly, the dialogue was droll and vapid.  And no contractions made him sound like a freaking robot. Who says, "Why yes, so and so?" The only time I use that is when I'm about to get into a verbal argument with someone, not croon about how they are strong and smart.

Also, there's no conflict. The writer thought there was.  "There's a ticking bomb right there!" he exclaimed.  That's not conflict.

Let's try this:

Steve: Oh (insert expletive)! A (insert expletive) bomb!
Joy: Oh my God! We need to call the bomb squad!
Steve: There's no time! We have to disarm it ourselves!
Joy: One week at Bomb Disposal and you're an expert? I'm calling the squad!
Steve: No, Joy! I can do it! I recognize the trigger.
Joy:  There's a school on this street, Steve! We need to evacuate the area!
Steve: I can DO this, Joy!
Joy: You do what you need to do. And I'll do the same.
Joy pulls out cell, makes the call to the precinct while Steve examines the bomb.

Do the characters look a little more human now? You have Steve who's all about the job. And Joy, who is not helpless, but wants to save lives. Maternal instinct, or just plain ethical, you decide.  But the conflict comes from their butting heads over how to deal with an issue.  THAT'S the conflict. Even when Steve proceeds to figure out how to disarm the bomb, Joy goes ahead and begins evacuation procedures.  Both are strong characters now. Both have different ways of dealing with situations, and that shows. Also, you know somewhere, there's a very bad villain lurking... a villain that cares nary a bit about little children. This bomb wasn't planted in an empty warehouse. No. The stakes have been upped.

There's a bunch more I can share with you, but I think I've ranted long enough. To cheer you up, here's a photo of a very close member of my family. ~SC

Photography: David E. Mitchell

Make up: Caley Caldwell

Wardrobe: TK Kelly

Model: Keagan Haney

Prepare Your Actors

I'm directing a short film, and so far it's going really well.

We've been in preproduction for months. Lots of moving parts, you know. Locations. Equipment. Lights. PAs. Craft services. Getting this movie SAG endorsed.

Being the director I have a unique insight into the characters... I know exactly what I'm looking for from my characters. I should. I wrote the film.

To prepare my actors, I gave them each a packet.  My film has three main characters, so each packet was tailored specifically for each of them. For my lead actress, I compiled data with unfavorable outcomes to help get her in a darker "zone" if you will.

My lead actor received a packet with statistics and data. His character is a thinker and a doer, and would know stats about the issue that is plaguing him.

For my supporting actress, I gave her a manual from a local police department on how to solve the crime the movie focuses on. On top of that, I sent her a two page back story on her character.

A few months before the shoot, we had a read through.  ALWAYS have a read through of your script. You'll hear what works and what doesn't. Dialogue is tricky, and believe me, in a film, if it's not organic, people will mock you for it. With the read through, I made some minor adjustments, and we were good to go.

On the shoot, while the crew set up the shots, I was able to sit with the main actors and go over their packets.The actors did a marvelous job of grasping their characters and bringing them to life. They asked questions; great questions; hard questions. I was able to gently direct them where the characters needed to be. Everything went wonderfully:  after a few takes, the roles "set in" and rather than watching actors, we were witnessing a couple going through intense pressure and merely capturing it. When you turn around and see the men on the crew in tears, you know you have something magical going on.

I'm not sharing this to brag. I'm sharing this to encourage you. Get a great Assistant Director.  Let him/her run your set so you can spend time with your actors.  The more time you cultivate with your actors, the more trust is established, and the better the performance you can draw out of them. Note, I say "draw out" not 'beat out'.

A lot of things will make or break your film. The writing. The sound. The acting. So do your best to create a safe haven for your actors.  It can only improve your film.  ~SC

Photo Credit: Erin Moore

From Writing To Directing To Producing

It's been over a year since my last post.  Shame on me. I've been literally swamped.

Without going into every project I've worked on, let me just say tomorrow, a children's television show that has been the desire of my heart to create is FINALLY being filmed!  I am executive producing and head writer of the show. I'm so excited. Tala Hobballah, Michael Haney, co-producers.

On top of that, I have cast some of the best kids in the region to be hosts. One of them, is sweet Noelia, a little one with Down's Syndrome.  I love being able to use the show as proof that kids with special needs can be viable to a production.  She is so excited and we are too!  What a cutie pie. I mean, look at her!

Isn't she precious???

I'll share more about the show once we have it filmed. :)  Let's just say it's pretty awesome!!!! 

I've also written another short film called The Alabaster Phoenix and stars my BFF and biz partner, Buffi Holland has the lead.  So very excited about that too!!!  Logline: A fragile widowed woman grapples with despair and loneliness by discovering her purpose in life.  Lots of locations, and I'm thrilled to possibly be using one of my favorite composers in the universe on this film. Films May 2014. Michael Haney, Dudley Jacobs, producing. 

I'm also producing a short film called PHASE 6. Phase 6 is about governmental population control via the use of flu shots.  It's a sci-fi thriller complete with CGI special effects, so I'm eager to see how this turns out and to work with Jeff Dolan, the director. :)  Starring Keagan Haney, Caleb Shore, Kim Kinsley, and Richard Chilton.  Films June 2014. 

Recently I completed filming a television pilot with the amazing Joe Carroll, writer and director. I earned a producer credit on this one. Can't share the name of the project... YET.  It's a superb concept and I hear it is gaining interest by various sources. As well it should. It's impeccably made and Joe has a keen eye for detail. Shot on the RED camera, the images are crisp, concise, and stunning to watch. 

AMAZING cast.  Photo by Michael Walters

I'm also producing a television show for The Children's Kindness Network called Moozie The Cow.   We have got a great music director, Sara Beck, and Executive Producer, Elandriel Lewis totally has a heart for kiddos.  Research consultants and casting the kiddos  are Colleen Russo, Emily Drossner and Christina Longo. I call them The Vandy Posse since they are all Vanderbilt minds. Ryan Rehnborg is animator. Starring Nina Borum and Caleb Shore.  Moozie the Cow is currently in production. 

So that's my irons in the fire at the moment. I have a few productions lined up to produce... Christopher Siaens "RAIN" is one of those projects. Tala Hobballah has a series she wants me to help her with, and of COURSE I will. Tala is amazing and I cannot say enough things about her and her awesomeness! 

Hopefully I will have a chance to be on here more! I hate such gaps in my entries. I will attempt to do better for you, my ever faithful fans!

Don't Call The Shots... Seriously.

Hello all!

Happy 2013!  Wow have I been busy! Whew!

First of all, let me give you an update. MADAME KOROVA was sucessfully filmed and is in the post production phase.  We all cannot WAIT to see this hit the festival circuit. It turned out to be so much fun to direct.

The talent agency that I own with my completely best friend in the whole wild world, Buffi Holland, has taken off at lightning speed and is flourishing.  You can check out S.T.A.R.S. Talent at HERE if you would like more information. Recently we have booked talent on CATCHING FIRE of yes, THE HUNGER GAMES fame and LAST VEGAS starring Robert Deniro, Kevin Kline, Michael Douglas, and Morgan Freeman.  I'm a proud mama, too... my daughter just got cast in a feature film herself! She starts filming in the fall in Indiana.

Because I've been so busy, I haven't had much chance to write (as you can see from the state of this humble blog!) HOWEVER, I thought I would swing by and offer you a useful screenwriting tip.

When you are writing a screenplay, never, NEVER, NEVER EVER EVER EVER write in or call the shots. I don't mean calling the shots as in deciding what's going on with your character, I mean, writing:

INT. MEDIUM SHOT - VICKI POURS FOOD INTO DOG BOWL

Don't do that.

"Why, ScreenwriterChic? Why should I not do that? How else are folks going to know what I want in this scene?"

Well, to put it bluntly, it ain't your baby anymore. And it's not your job to tell the director what to do.

Once your script has been handed over to a director, it's the director who adds vision to the story and makes it complete.  You have given the framework.  Don't be sad! Your idea may be cool and all, but it's really awesome to see a director come on board with a fresh set of eyes and incorporate their vision with yours. And think about this too... if you put in camera angles and look like a complete noob and an inexperienced dreamer, you will annoy your reader, which is the person you want on your side, believe me! The reader passes on your work of art to the studios.

Now, if you absolutely HAVE to get a certain shot across, there is a way to do it and look professional and NOT step all over the director's toesies.  OR annoy your power wielding reader.

That is in scene description.


EXT. MT. FUJI - DAY

A small speck in the snow, Jessica rummages through her pack.

No food. Disgusted, she throws the pack and SCREAMS.


Okay, did you see what happened here?  A small speck in the snow?  Did you see an aerial shot with that?  And when Jessica couldn't find any food and tosses the bag, you were closer up in your mind's eye, weren't you?

Your scene description frames the picture in the mind of your reader. It's the same as calling your camera angles, but it's a much more appropriate way to do it so you don't have an offended director. Or reader.

And that's what you want, isn't it?

Update on Madame Korova!

Madame Korova  preparation is on way!

We have just opened our kick starter campaign to help offset the budget of this film. Would you please consider helping fund our project?  It's a great film!

Click here: Madame Korova

Thanks in advance for all your support!

Best,

Marti

Great Writing

When you read great writing, you know it. It sticks with you.

In film, the image that sticks with you is a result of words on a written page. You don't think that way... you usually give the director most of the credit for being so brilliant, but it's the writer that has captured your heart. The director was the vessel that caught his vision and brought it forth on a screen so you could see the writer's imagination.  Believe it or not, some directors just can't write.  I will not name names. :)

A dear friend of mine brought a commercial to my attention. I wanted to link it here so you can see what I mean about great writing.

Try and guess what is being sold in this commercial.  I tried. I bet you will never get it until the reveal.

It's an amazing commercial and was executed masterfully.  This is one of my favorite all time works. 

Warning... it looks pretty creepy.. just hang on until the end and you will understand why this commercial is such genius.

http://vimeo.com/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=22984504&server=vimeo.com&show_title=0&show_byline=0&show_portrait=0&color=00adef&fullscreen=1&autoplay=1&loop=0


Let me know what you think of it.

~SC

PS For the next 2 weeks, I will in Los Angeles following mine and my daughter's dreams,  plus doing lots of touristy stuff.  I'll try to keep you  updated.

Work For What You Want!!

The movie industry is a monster.

It will eat you up, spit you out, and never look back.  So, to get what you want, you have to fight for it.  The best example I can give you at the moment is this story:

http://www.tennessean.com/article/20110118/WILLIAMSON0702/101180302/Take-a-Bow-Budding-actress-eager-to-work-for-her-ride-to-stardom

This little girl has a once in a chance opportunity and do you think she's relying on anyone else to get her to Tinsel Town?  No! She has totally taken life by the horns and is captain of her own destiny.  (I can say this with my pride in my font because this little girl happens to be my daughter!)

Our family has obstacles, whose doesn't?  But for my daughter, Keagan, the word NO is not an option.  She believes. She fights. She wills.  She overcomes. 

We all need that tenacity in life, no matter if you're a screenwriter, a gaffer, a pediatrician or an electrician! 

Do you have a story?  Write it!  Take criticism constructively!  Make notes, changes and whatever it takes to get your work read! And then... like my little girl....

DON'T GIVE UP!!!!

2011: A Call To Arms!

Ahhhh… My first post of the new year.

What will 2011 bring?

More writing, more ideas.

I read over the weekend that this summer will be known as the SUMMER OF SEQUELS. Movies that will fill slots on movie marquees for 2011:

Pirates of the Caribbean 4

Harry Potter (I’ve lost count on these)

The Hangover 2

Mission Impossible 4

Final Destination 5

Cars 2

Scream 4

Transformers 3

Spy Kids 4

Kung Fu Panda 2

Fast Five (the latest segment in the Fast and the Furious franchise)


Some of these may be good, and some may be a colossal failure, but one thing jumps out at me just from looking at this list.

Hollywood needs originality. A new story. A new idea. Next summer we’ll have another Superman, Spiderman and Batman movie.

There are plenty of great writers out there, you included!

Let’s all sit down, write a kickin’ story and show Hollywood how to make money off of a story that’s fresh, new, and innovative instead of beating dead horses until they’re well, more dead. Did you know they are making another installment in the SHREK series? Yep! Now it’s just about Puss ‘N’ Boots.

THE MATRIX took Hollywood by storm. New, thought provoking and it broke boundaries. I adore this movie. Even though the trilogy is over and done with, I still watch and am amazed at it. What inventive minds to create such a story!!

I’m sick and tired of paying $10 to see a sequel that 1.) Either never should have been made or 2.) Should have been a made for TV movie. Granted, these sequels have better budgets than made for TV movies!

Where are the writers? Where are the great ideas? YOU have them! I have them!

So, let’s sit down and write it out… let’s make time to get those rewrites done and share our scripts! We have great ideas!

Anything is better than a life dominated by sequels, isn’t it?

In conclusion, my first blog of the year is a call to arms. For all great writers to create that script of their dreams. For in the months ahead to bombard Hollywood with new ideas and not take no for an answer.
So, write, write, write! It's in your hands!

Make It Tough!

I was going through some past dated blogs by other screenwriters the other day and found this one from Will Akers blog called (like his book) Your Screenplay Sucks!  This is so true. Read on wonderful reader!

Make It Tough For ‘Em!


March 9, 2010

Never GIVE your characters anything.

Make them earn it. Make them fight for EVERYTHING. Every single little thing… if it’s easy for them to get, then the story is boring.

Go through your script and list everything your hero gets. The boy’s phone number. The key to the hotel room. The location of the hidden safe. The cure for cancer. Whatev. Anything they get, look at it, and see if you can make it more difficult for them to get…

Make them earn everything. Make them sweat to get it.

If your hero just gets stuff cause he’s cute, then we don’t feel he deserves it. Just like Robert Redford, when he was auditioning for the lead in THE GRADUATE. The director asked him what it was like not to score with a girl… and Redford said, “What do you mean?” Redford never had to worry about a girl telling him “No.” so he didn’t get the part. Nichols cast a guy who would have to earn Katharine Ross, and we believed his story.

Look at every single event in your story and see if your hero has to struggle to get what you give him (or her!). If it’s easy, you’ve got a weak moment… and you can fix it!

Words of wisdom from Will Akers.  I suggest you heed his advice! :)

The Last Word

One of the best things I've learned as a screenwriter is to put the most important word at the END of sentence. 

THAT is where the punch is!

For instance:

I had written a line of dialogue where a naughty merc stated:  "I'd kill my mother for that kind of money."

Rewritten it became:  "For that kind of money, I'd kill my mother."

See? It shocks you... the brain works to put the sentence together and the last word is the final piece of the puzzle. 

One of the best examples I have ever seen was written by Louis L'Amour. (My nod to Will Akers for the quote.) Tell me what YOU think about it.


“I just pointed my rifle at him … and let him have the big one right through the third button on his shirt. If he ever figured to sew that particular button on again he was going to have to scrape it off his backbone.”

Use Your Gift!

Writing is a craft.

Some say a skill. I think that's a little obtuse. Skill means it can be learned.  Craft means it can be felt and expressed. At least to me that is.

Writing is a gift.

Some of us have it, and some of us... don't.

I received a script yesterday from a very talented and I believe gifted writer. She asked me to peruse it and tell her what I thought.  And I did.

I don't lie. What good am I to you if I don't tell you the truth about your writing?

Luckily, "Heinzy" is a great writer, with fresh ideas.  Her script was easy to read and well thought out. She had a compelling and thought provoking story. And I loved it.

A couple of things were "off" like changing from present to past tenses (writers always have to be on their toes for that), and using the word IS. 

If you see the word IS in your script (not during dialogue of course) then it is probably followed by a verb ending in ING, which makes your story have passive voice.  Agents, producers, readers, etc., HATE passive voice.  However, I personally, overlooked that for the sheer intelligence and brilliant story line she had woven.

So, way to go, Heinzy!  You have a great talent, wonderful ideas, and I can't wait to see your stuff get made!

Now for the rest of you...

What are YOU doing to chase down your dreams?

ALIENS! UFO'S! OH MY!

I'm not sure if anyone has been following this on the news about the recent documented sightings of the UFO's that have been seen in the U.S., China, etc. All of the sightings are similar.

News report on recent sighting in El Paso, TX

Now, when it comes to this, I'm such a skeptic. I held out for YEARS about crop circles and wouldn't you know it, someone came forward and admitted they did it. And they showed how. I don't know if they were telling the truth. I'm just saying I'm a skeptic.

But with this, I'm a little enamoured. Not because of the possibility of life outside of Earth, or the possible answer to a Bible prophecy. And then there's that part of me, deep down that secretly hopes if they ARE aliens, they don't REALLY do anal probes.

I'm interested to see what movies come out of this.

You know it'll happen. Writers everywhere are watching these stories, talking with people in the area of the sightings, and making notes.  And it'll hit theaters before 2012 to ensure we have mass panic and cult suicides.

So, while part of me is thinking this is an Orsen Welles' thing (it's rather profound to have it all over the world), part of me is thinking, "Man, who's gonna write the story first?"

Will it be you?

Adaptation... A Moment In Time

When working on an adaptation, you will have to prepare yourselves that the story will change.


It’s inevitable.

Remember the story of Pinnochio? Jiminy Cricket and all that real boy stuff? Well, in the true story, Pinnochio KILLS the cricket! And on purpose, too! It wasn’t during a cheerful musical moment. Now ask yourself why Walt Disney didn’t put that in his now classic animated movie?

I’m currently writing and rewriting an adaptation from a short story with some students. It’s the longest short story I’ve heard of, and has several stories within the story. How can we get all of that into ten pages for a ten minute short?

We can’t.

We must ADAPT.

We read the story and saw that the main strain, the main truth through the story was that our hero was a habitual liar. Bam! Now our story is about a habitual liar. From here, we pick our favorite scenes and push the story forward. We lose the fact that the hero has an uncle with Down’s Syndrome. Did it move the story forward? No. Cut it. Did it matter that her false boyfriend went to Dartmouth? No. Cut it.

An adaptation is different than a creation of a script. It’s like you have a puzzle box full random of pieces. Some of them fit and some don’t and it’s up to you to figure it all out to make a picture people can see.

And when adapting a SHORT film (as we are):

It’s all about a moment.

Once you find the truth of the story, focus on the one moment that moves you. That’s all you have time to show. One moment.

And that is a FAR cry from an entire story, isn’t it?

Honing Your Craft... and a little Matt Damon

Hello my wonderful fans and readers!

My tribe of munchkins are now in school, so my life MAY become a bit quieter now… (insert insane laughter here).

Anyhoo… since I’m a writer, I figured I would share with you another way to become awesome.  Or at least prove to yourself that you need to take classes OR find another route of prospective employment. (I’m not trying to be harsh, believe me).

Go online to Drew’s Scriptorama. You can google it. From there, download a script. Not a script that says First Draft, because I can assure you it is almost NOTHING like the movie.

Print it out, but don’t read it. Seriously. Don’t.

Then, rent the movie.

As the movie plays, have your laptop or whatever with you.  Pause the movie.

Here’s the fun part:

Write a script for what you saw.

For instance, if you are watching the movie, THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM, you would possibly watch the first two minutes and write what you saw. (I’d watch the whole movie first though, because it is an amazingly fun ride).

So, you would something like write:

EXT. MOSCOW STREET – NIGHT

JASON BOURNE runs to a pharmacy.

And then pick up from there. After you have about a page or two done, pull out the script that you printed. Compare. You will be flabbergasted at how different they are.

EXT. NIGHT – HOUSING PROJECTS – MOSCOW

We are JASON BOURNE and we’re running down an alley.

SUPER: MOSCOW

BLUE LIGHTS -- from the distance -- strobing through the night -- rushing toward us -- POLICE CARS -- three of them - - SIRENS HOWLING as they bear down -- closer -- faster -- until they whip past the alley...

That’s a little big more descriptive than Jason Bourne runs to a pharmacy, isn’t it?

Try it! I started with more laid back films, but as I progressed in my writing and writing hardcore action flicks, this has really come in handy.

You may find that you are missing information that your script NEEDS. You may find that you are giving too much boring information:

SUSIE (blonde, scantily clad, 23) sets down her coffee before dialing her cell phone.

Becomes:

SUSIE (blonde, scantily clad, 23) dials her cell.

It’s amazing what you can learn about the craft and yourself. Plus, you get to see a movie!

Drama is Action

Thanks to you, my wonderful readers, for your patience as I grieved (and still do so) the passing of my sister, Tracey. If I know Tracey at all, she’d be severely upset with me for not posting another blog entry sooner, and about screenwriting. SO! Here you go!


I read in a fantabulous book called “Essentials of Screenwriting” by Richard Walter that “drama is action.”

“Well, duh!” you say. But let me ask you. How many times have you seen a bunch of characters sitting around talking about nothing that advances your movie plot? It’s the lull in the movie where folks go to the bathroom and get more popcorn. Or worse.

If you have a script with that kind of scene in it, cut it out NOW. If you’re going to have a scene with people gabbing, it better darn well advance your plot. You can’t be precious about your script. By that I mean, if you write a kickin’ dialogue that you love; it really doesn’t help your plot but you still keep it in there. Why? Because you like it.

It’s not what you like that will sell your screenplay.

Your plot must always be moving, always be pushing ahead. By doing so, your reader will gladly follow and that is exactly what you want.

Again from the book mentioned above, the author states (and quite accurately):

“Screenwriters are required, therefore, to determine for each scene the action that most effectively advances the story and expands the characters and also to craft the ideal setting for that action.”

As a screenwriter, we can’t hope the reader will ‘understand’ what we’re hoping to convey. We must show them. Readers don’t have time to try and decipher. That’s what the grand round circular file is for, and I really don’t think that was the action, the drama, you wanted for your script, now was it?

I Got A Pat On The Back!

As you all should know, Will Akers, author of Your Screenplay Sucks! 100 Ways To Make It Great, is my mentor. I continue to help him on projects, and he in turn, helps me on mine.

Recently, I outlined a new screenplay I'm working on. I believe it's a fresh idea, but I needed some help on opening it. I had a lot of fade ins and outs at the beginning and consulted him on how to write it.

"Email me your pages," he said.

I did. 

The next day, this showed up on his blog:
(Reprinted with permission from Will)

a little research is good…

June 19, 2010

Be specific, but be specific in the right way.

A student of mine, who is a very good writer… probably because she is a very good writer, not because she’s a student of mine, wrote this…

***

INT. MERCY HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOM – NIGHT

Meg completes her run ticket.

***
Do you know what a “run ticket” is? I do not. Do you think Meg knows what it is? I bet she does. This is a marvelous example of knowing what you’re writing about… but not letting the research get in the way. We read that sentence, have no idea what “run ticket” is, but we also get the sense, mostly via osmosis, that it is the CORRECT thing, and that it fits and is meet and right and good and just and all that stuff.

Good on ya, Marti!

Conversely, I recently critiqued a screenplay… and I have no idea who wrote it, or what it was about… One of the marvelous services I provide as screenplay critic is a leaky brain, one from which knowledge and memory of your story trickles with the setting sun. I read. I crit. I forget. So, if you want me to crit again, it’s like I am reading for the first time. I’m like a bee. I have a three day memory.

Anyway, this writer was writing some sort of WALL STREET type business script. The writer obviously was not a Wall Street business type, because the scene description, instead of some perfectly perfect description of a Wall Street woman hard at work, would say “Alice works on some papers.” That shouted for Lassie like little Timmy in the well, “Get me outta here!”

Every time the writer would take us to the office, there would be bland references to the work being done. “They work hard.” “Everyone is busy.” Stuff like that.

Not: “Meg completes her run ticket.”

THAT is a fantastic sentence, and it TOTALLY makes me buy that the writer knows what she’s writing about, and it calmed me down and urged me forward, secure in the knowledge that I was in the hands of Someone Who Knows, instead of Someone Who Hopes I Won’t Notice.

 
**Wow! Thanks for the pat on the back, Will! Considering it comes from one of the most objective voices in screenplay critquing, and from a seasoned actual screenwriter with movies that have been made, I'm truly honored.  ~Marti AKA ScreenwriterChic**
 
You can order Will's book (HIGHLY recommended and such an easy read) at http://www.yourscreenplaysucks.com/html/order_my_useful_book.html
 
And I'm sure it's on Amazon as well.
 

PROOFREAD!!!

You know what reeks of amateurs? Work riddled with type-o's.
I've been cleaning out old emails and I found one that I had written to my staff. (Yes, I have a staff, no it's not that kind).

I wanted to share it with you, since I had to eat humble pie and admit I actually sent an email with an error in it. Horrible. And, before you ask, yes, I DID have to send out the email. Why? To squelch rumors. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Read on, dear fan! And see how important it is to proofread! And yes, this IS an actual email I sent out.

Sent: Wednesday, October 10, 2007 9:44 AM

To: All Staff

Subject: amendment

Okay Girls,

This is an amendment to my email I sent out earlier.

I want to make it very clear that I did have a type-o and that Patti had mice rice on her SHELF. NOT her SELF.

I hope this corrects any problems that could have been misconstrued.

So, to make it clear: Patti is NOT infested with MICE on her person. It's her shelf that they apparently like to hang out on. NOT Patti.

Patti is not a friend to rodents, as my hedgehog can attest. Patti does not have mice on her or anywhere in her clothing. Patti, as a person, is completely 100% mice free.

Therefore, Patti will NOT be exterminated, nor will we call an exterminator to check her out. I hope this clears everything up.

Should you have any questions about the matter, feel free to ask me.

Signed,

Your Loving Boss

 
See what I mean? How embarassing! PROOFREAD!
 

Be Prepared For Anything!

This Friday I begin shooting another short film. A real one, not shot and edited within 24 hours for a competition.

What have I gotten myself into????

Every weekend in June I will be consumed in this new project. So if you don't hear from me for a while, I have not abandoned you, precious fans... I'm merely exhausted and probably collapsed in a puddle of my own drool as my body tries to recover from stress and lack of sleep.

Ah, stress. That brings me to my the point of this blog... be prepared for anything!

This project has been rolling around in my pea brain for a good many months and thanks to the graciousness of the powers that be, all equipment is on loan without a penny paid. Yeah! I have a shooting schedule prepared and a list of things for my Production Assistant. Who bailed.

It wasn't her fault, there were a lot of factors involved and family goings ons that caused her to cease her service to me. It was her family also, who was graciously allowing me to film in their wonderful home. It was her mom who was going to a role in the film. In fact, I had rewritten the script so her little sister could be in it too! So my PA bails and guess what?

No house, no actress, no little sister actress,  no Production Assistant. 

Sigh.

In a screenplay, this would be known as the "All Is Lost Moment".

(pause)

And then, the hero finds the strength to go and gives an award winning speech:

Shall I be discouraged at this HUGE GINORMOUS mountain in my way? Heck NO! Mountains are made to be climbed!

I shall press on... the shooting will go as scheduled. I have a Production Coordinator, Michael. He is chomping at the bit to show his worth. My advice to him? Snag a Production Assistant and get ready! I have never micro managed, so I'm leaving it to him to find the actress and site.

I'm revising the script as I go. Welcome to filming. If you think you're done when you type Fade Out, or when your agent says he'll shop it, or when the producer says he loves it, or when the studio buys it, you're wrong. There's always a rewrite dangling just a breath away!

Be prepared and don't melt. You're being watched at all times.

If I freak out over a short film, what will I do if I'm directing something huge in Hollywood? (Which I WILL do one day, mark my words).


Every day is an adventure. Be prepared! Roll with it. Put out fires. Solve problems. LIVE!!!

Later sweet fans! One more pic for ya...

Memorable Characters Take Memorable Writing

To create memorable characters, I’d like to make a suggestion.

Keep a journal of overheard dialogue. Gasp! ScreenwriterChic, are you telling me to eavesdrop? Yep! I’m not saying stalk anyone, but you can grasp different rhythms, different accents when you eavesdrop. No one wants to hear characters that all sound like you. Each character must have a distinct voice. Each character must be different.

One of my favorite lines from a movie is, “Yeah. You blend.” It’s from MY COUSIN VINNY, written by Dale Launer (whom I have had the privilege of speaking with… but about RUTHLESS PEOPLE). I love this line so much that I posted it as a status on Facebook the other day.

You’d be surprised the reception it had! For three pages, people posted their favorite lines from the movie. Which tells me it was great writing.

When you make your character, each one MUST have their own voice. Lisa didn’t sound a THING like Vinny (of course she was female!) They both had thick New York accents, but her rhythm, her speech pattern was different. Her ideas were different. Her focus was different, which crafted her character. By the time Marisa Tomei got a hold of the part, it was just finishing touches that were needed.

Each character had a distinct voice. You could tell each character was DRAMATICALLY different.

“Are you mockin’ me in that outfit?”

“Mrs. Reilly. And only Mrs. Reilly!”

“A doe eyed little de-uh!”

“I don’t know! I’m a fast cook, I guess!”

“Same make and model tire!”

“Aidin’ and abettin’!”

“Maybe the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove! Were these magic grits?”

“Ladies and gentlemen of the j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-jury.”

“Seb’n bushes!”

“The two what?”
“What?”
“Did you say, Utes?”

Oh, excuse me, Your Honor. The two youths.”

Can you see these characters? The diversity adds so much depth to the story, a reality to it, if you will, and every scene becomes memorable. So much so that Marisa Tomei walked away with an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress.

Make your characters memorable. They will make or break your script, and ultimately, your movie.